-----
Sound of doorbell. Title card
against a blue sky. A newspaper flies through the air and straight through the
Golfer’s letterbox.
INT.
HALLWAY - DAY
A
newspaper falls through the letterbox on a front door. A man walks over and
picks it up. This man is the GOLFER, a tall man wearing a green golf shirt,
hat, shoes and trousers. The man sees a large headline on the newspaper and
gasps - it reads "$10,000,000 prize offered at Golfing Championship".
The Golfer clearly becomes excited and nods decisively.
EXT.
GARDEN – DAY
The
Golfer carefully places the golf ball on a tee in his back garden. The garden
is very large with flat, green, freshly-cut grass, a pond and a single tree at
the end and fencing all around the garden obscuring the view outside. At the
end of his garden, the Golfer has very badly dug a hole for the golf ball to
land into which is clearly too large.
We see shots of these in the
order as they are described above. Shot of the Golfer looking at where the
golf-hole is.
The
Golfer swings carefully then hits the golf ball. The ball misses the hole and
lands near the tree.
The
Golfer GROANS LOUDLY.
Match-on-action shots of each of
these.
We
cut to the Golfer trying again. This time he hits the golf ball into the pond.
The
Golfer then hits the ball again. It's clear in his aim that he is frustrated
and not putting much effort into it. The ball lands in the tree. The Golfer
gives a fed-up look and SIGHS LOUDLY.
Quickly-cut montage of all of the
Golfer’s attempts to hit the ball successfully.
Next
the Golfer hits the ball over the fence and we hear the ball hitting an old
lady, who falls over with her bags of groceries.
Only hear the sound effects;
possibly hear a car alarm.
The
golfer growls angrily. The Golfer then calms down and looks at the golf hole
again. He sighs then proceeds to try one more time. This time he aims much more
carefully with greater precision. He hits the ball and it finally goes into the
golf hole. The Golfer cheers and shouts excitedly, then looks at his newspaper
again feeling much happier.
EXT.
PLAYING FIELD - DAY
The
big day has arrived. Another GOLFER has just taken a shot but the ball lands
too far from the hole. The other golfer cries loudly in anger and hurries off.
Our Golfer simply laughs as he starts taking his place in preparation for his
perfect shot. A large crowd is seen behind him sitting in stadium seating.
The other golfer has different
clothing to our golfer. We see the other golfer hitting the ball from a far
distance from where our golfer is.
The
whole time the Commentator is heard talking, the Golfer is looking very nervous
as he prepares his perfect shot. He keeps moving hesitantly as if he is unsure
at what moment to hit the ball.
A series of close-up and extreme
close-up shots follow of the Golfer, the golf ball, the golf club and the
target.
The
Golfer finally hits the ball. There is complete silence.
The
ball hits the ground after a prolonged silence. It moves its way around the
golf hole. Everyone is watching. Finally the golf ball lands in the hole. The
crowd cheers and the Golfer cheers loudest of all.
Suddenly,
the sounds of cheering start to fade. Also Sprach Zarathustra by Richard Strauss
plays.
Sound effects go quiet; the music
is the only thing we hear now. The lighting also darkens.
The
Golfer looks in disbelief as the golf ball emerges out of the golf hole again,
moving very, very slowly. The Golfer gasps in horror as he sees the golf ball
is riding on a GOPHER.
The
Gopher brings the ball back up to the surface again in a shot referencing the
opening of 2001: A Space Odyssey.
The Gopher’s face is first
revealed on the first “dun-dun’ cue. Shorten the 2001 music for the film’s shorter
running time.
The
Golfer slams his golf club to the ground in a similar way to how the apes in
2001: A Space Odyssey slam bones to the ground. He is clearly angry and
frustrated. It is very clear now that the Golfer has lost the tournament.
Clouds appear behind the Golfer;
before he lost the game the sky was pure blue.
The
Gopher throws the golf ball off his head, which hits and smashes the camera.
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