Monday 6 October 2014

Gopher Golf: Script and Story Development

The idea I chose to go with for my AX3001 film project is "Gopher Golf" (still currently a working title).

Gopher Golf

This film tells the story of a golfer living somewhere in America. He reads a newspaper advertisement for a large golf tournament which involves a huge cash prize. All sorts of mishaps get in the way of the golfer's training as he becomes more and more obsessed with fame and fortune. Finally, on the day of the big tournament, he thinks he has scored the perfect try and boasts about his win, until a gopher emerges from the ground revealing the golfer has failed.

I spent some time since my last post developing the story and the character of the Golfer. The film is a comedy and the motivation for the Golfer is his obsession with fame and fortune. I decided the initial synopsis (as can be seen above) had a strong enough beginning and ending, but needed more material in the middle. I decided this would be a great opportunity to set up the Golfer's greedy personality, which is key to making the conclusion of the film more effective and much funnier.

I did some research into what makes pitfalls and comeuppances in comedy really work, most notably the classic Tom & Jerry and Looney Tunes cartoons. I also considered classic slapstick comedians including Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton.




I largely used the Tom & Jerry short "Tee for Two" (1945) as a source of inspiration for the style of comedy used in my own film.


This style of humour works well with the storyline I have chosen, since I have known from the very beginning there will be no dialogue from the main character himself (the Golfer). It also differs to the style of comedy used in the film "Caddyshack" (1980), another source of inspiration for the film. Tom & Jerry focuses more on the slapstick humour the characters are famous for, which is much more ideal for a short film. The main characters themselves never spoke unless required for comedic purposes - only supporting characters such as Spike and Mammy Two Shoes ever spoke regularly. The first draft of my script currently includes the Commentator of the game as a speaking character - he is never seen on screen, but his presence is still necessary to add realism to the game of golf, as well as essentially acting as a narrator.

The Commentator has some dialogue in the final competition which is necessary for moving the story along as a 'narrator'. This is an idea I am very confident will be carried through to the final draft of the screenplay. I also considered including dialogue from the same Commentator in the first half of the film - in this case, adding to the comedy and frustrating the main character with his comments. I have now completed two drafts of the script - one with and one without this idea being included.

The Golfer will only communicate in body language or noises such as grunts, laughter, crying, cheers and other exclamations which are international and require no translation. This was partly inspired by the way characters in films by Aardman Animations communicate with each other - most notably Gromit (Wallace & Gromit), Morph & Chas, and the Farmer and other human characters in Shaun the Sheep.




The film will also feature no music and mostly rely on sound effects - I have recently watched the Ryder Cup for research into the film's subject matter and found the quiet sounds of the game are very atmospheric. I have decided to reflect this in the film to add a sense of realism - this also adds tension in the final scene and balances out the slapstick comedy. The only exception with the music is one piece that will be included in the end for comedic effect - 'Also Sprach Zarathustra' (German for 'Thus Spoke Zarathustra'), most famously heard in the Stanley Kubrick film '2001: A Space Odyssey' (1969). A royalty free version of this music is legally available through composer Kevin MacLeod.

To make the comeuppance of the main character funnier (the gopher returning the golf ball), I used the research above to set up who the main character is. The main character - the Golfer - is conceited and obsessed with fame and fortune to the point where he'll do anything to win. I had the idea to set this up with a montage where he is training for the final championship and all sorts of slapstick-type situations get in his way, from the ball landing in someone else's garden to the ball landing in a pond.

Before the Golfer takes his own perfect shot at the final championship, another golfer fails miserably at his perfect shot and our Golfer bursts out laughing. This is included to show how our Golfer thinks he is clearly the best and he'll do anything to win the competition. The Golfer is also seen frequently staring at his newspaper with the headline about the competition, showing the audience how obsessed he is with the game.

Very few characters will be (needed to be) included in the final film, as the main emphasis is on the Golfer and his comeuppance when the Gopher appears. An audience will be seen in stadium seating behind the Golfer at the final competition, although this can be easily drawn or added in as part of the background. The other Golfer who is seen taking a shot before our Golfer is the only other character seen on screen. The script does not require both golfers to be seen together, so I am currently considering using the same armature/rig for both but with different heads and clothes. The Gopher will be a hand puppet (similar to how Sooty and Sweep are operated) and also does not need to appear in the same shots as the Golfer - a larger scale set will be created for the Gopher's scenes. The golf ball used on the Gopher's set will be a real golf ball - on the Golfer's set a miniature version will be created.

I have currently written out two drafts of the script which will be enough to create storyboards and an animatic from. The animatic will be especially useful for testing out the timings of the story, which still has to fit in a time of three minutes.

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