Monday, 6 October 2014

Gopher Golf: Second draft of script

Below is the second draft of the script for "Gopher Golf". This version cuts down the amount of dialogue from the Commentator.



INT. HALLWAY - DAY
A newspaper falls through the letterbox on a front door. A man walks over and picks it up. This man is the GOLFER, a tall man wearing a green golf shirt, hat, shoes and shorts. The man sees a large headline on the newspaper and gasps - it reads "$10,000,000 prize offered at Golfing Championship". The Golfer clearly becomes excited and nods decisively.
EXT. GARDEN - DAY
The Golfer carefully places the golf ball on a tee in his back garden. The garden is very large with flat, green, freshly-cut grass, a pond and a single tree at the end and fencing all around the garden obscuring the view outside. At the end of his garden, the Golfer has very badly dug a hole for the golf ball to land into which is clearly too large.
The Golfer swings carefully then hits the golf ball. The ball misses the hole and lands near the tree.
The Golfer GROANS LOUDLY.
We cut to the Golfer trying again. This time he hits the golf ball into the pond.
The Golfer then hits the ball again. It's clear in his aim that he is frustrated and not putting much effort into it. The ball lands in the tree. The Golfer gives a fed-up look and SIGHS LOUDLY.
Next the Golfer hits the ball over the fence and we hear the ball hitting an old lady, who falls over with her bags of groceries.
The golfer growls angrily. The Golfer then calms down and looks at the golf hole again. He sighs then proceeds to try one more time. This time he aims much more carefully with greater precision. He hits the ball and it finally goes into the golf hole. The Golfer cheers and shouts excitedly, then looks at his newspaper again feeling much happier.
EXT. PLAYING FIELD - DAY
The big day has arrived. Another GOLFER has just taken a shot but the ball lands too far from the hole. The other golfer cries loudly in anger and hurries off. Our Golfer simply laughs as he starts taking his place in preparation for his perfect shot. A large crowd is seen behind him sitting in stadium seating.
The whole time the Commentator is heard talking, the Golfer is looking very nervous as he prepares his perfect shot. He keeps moving hesitantly as if he is unsure at what moment to hit the ball.
COMMENTATOR (V.O.)
(quietly)
And now, we have our final competitor for the day. This guy seems to have come out of nowhere but his performance so far has been pretty impressive. Now he just needs to complete this to have taken the contest and won 10 million dollars.
The Golfer finally hits the ball. There is complete silence.
The ball hits the ground after a prolonged silence. It moves its way around the golf hole. Everyone is watching. Finally the golf ball lands in the hole. The crowd cheers and the Golfer cheers loudest of all.
Suddenly, the sounds of cheering start to fade. Also Sprach Zarathustra by Richard Strauss plays.
The Golfer looks in disbelief as the golf ball emerges out of the golf hole again, moving very, very slowly. The Golfer gasps in horror as he sees the golf ball is riding on a GOPHER.
The Gopher brings the ball back up to the surface again in a shot referencing the opening of 2001: A Space Odyssey.
The Golfer slams his golf club to the ground in a similar way to how the apes in 2001: A Space Odyssey slam bones to the ground. He is clearly angry and frustrated. It is very clear now that the Golfer has lost the tournament.
The Gopher throws the golf ball off his head, which hits and smashes the camera.

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